This is good. First of all, who doesn’t love their pillow? Second, adding the comfort of your pillow to the love of your spouse and you get a magical combination! Unless, of course, you have a pillow problem – which we have had – but we’ll save that for another day. Let’s assume for this post that everyone is comfortable with their pillow!
We have four kids between 10-17 who have tons of activities, and we each have our own careers. There are days when finding time to connect are downright impossible! Then we find ourselves falling asleep on the couch as we begin to wind down our day after the kids go to bed.
Now, we all know the importance of connecting with our spouse each day, and at a minimum, we should find 10-15 minutes to just talk one-on-one. “Pillow talk” may be that one opportunity to connect so let’s dig in to this a little deeper.
This definition of “pillow talk” in the urban dictionary is perfect: for two people to enjoy each other’s presence through conversation, in a somewhat spontaneous way, but in a way that will let both parties go to bed with clear heads.
Creating this time to connect can serve several purposes. First and foremost, it can catch you up with each other on your day – even if you each only take 2-4 minutes about the highlights of your day.
Second, it can lead to intimacy. This intimacy can have two forms. One form can be just sharing a few close moments with your spouse to connect from the day while you lay closely next to each other. That alone will create intimacy.
Another form, can be sexual intimacy. As you connect through “pillow talk”, you will find yourself getting closer to your spouse. You lay close to each other, she puts her head on your chest, you start talking, and as the old saying goes “one thing leads to another…”!
Dr. Kim Kimberling is a marriage counselor for over 30 years who has a ton of resources on his website, Awesome Marriage. He hit on an important point of why “pillow talk” has a special place in our hearts as couples. He reminded us that when we were dating, we would often talk to each other either in bed, or just before going to bed. This is the earliest form of “pillow talk”. Remember — when we were dating we wanted that person to be the very last person we spoke with before falling asleep?
We have written much about the need to remember the times we were dating – and the importance of continuing to date – and this is yet another great reminder.
“Pillow talk” – a wonderful opportunity to grow your relationship!