Joya and I usually write posts together but I’m taking this one solo.
Father’s Day has taken on a much different tone since my divorce. For several years now I have not had my children on Father’s Day. I try to convince myself it’s not really a big deal. I’ll see them in a few more days and we’ll do something special together.
Probably the hardest thing is that everyone else makes a big deal about Father’s Day (understandably) starting first thing in the morning at church. So when churches ask Dad’s to stand, I don’t get to thank God for my kids and look at them at the same time. As much as I try to escape everyone else’s focus on it – it’s just plain hard to avoid and pretend that it’s just another day.
I truly don’t like attention so I’m not suggesting it’s me that needs the attention. Heck, I have been ignoring my birthday for decades! But I do enjoy spending time and playing games with my kids – so the worldly person inside me says: “everyone else is doing it so I should be able to also!”
Part of this feeling stems from the tradition we had growing up where my family, brothers and Mom, got together to celebrate my Dad – God rest his soul. That was a fun time getting together with siblings to pay special attention to an awesome Dad and all he had done for us growing up.
I know I have a ton of company with these feelings. So many of you have lost your father as I have, others of you are experiencing empty nest syndrome which is also hard and, probably the hardest situations are those of you who have lost children – that is utterly heartbreaking and tragic for parents – and then there are others of you who are divorced like me and may not have your kids on Father’s Day.
I’ve REALIZED – in the grand scheme of things, this truly IS just another day.
We all face pain either missing children or missing fathers but there is ONE constant that WE MUST REMEMBER:
Our Heavenly Father is there for us today, tomorrow, and every day until we meet Him in heaven! We must let Him comfort us in our time of sadness and then we should rejoice in the blessings He has given us!
So rather than try to avoid Father’s Day – I am going to embrace Father’s Day. I thank God for my worldly Father who died 11 years ago. I thank God for giving me the honor of being a father, and step-father. I thank God for my wife, Joya, who has chosen to walk through this crazy journey with me. And most importantly, I thank my Heavenly Father for yesterday’s, today’s and tomorrow’s blessings.
Happy Father’s Day!